Gratitude!

Here.

Although I can put it as well as NameForthcomingTard can:

Within one year we've gone from, "...how in the world can we ever pay off this much debt?" to "...how much longer will it take for us to pay off the remainder of this debt?” which for us was a huge improvement.

(do you think he even knows about this place?)

And exercise your right to snark! Leave a comment on this post.

Its Voting Day! Exercise your right to snark!

You've submitted the nicknames, and now you get to vote! The poll is over there on the right. Closes in one week so vote for your favourite! The one that will change your life completely!

Think of it like voting for a new president, but different.

Yes, we CAN give him a new nickname.

(and yeah, I'm going to hell. I'll be sure to have the margaritas going for all of you haterz and snarkerz).

Oh poo!

Before we get down to business, remember to submit your nickname for this guy. We've only got a couple so far, and if you don't submit more, I won't need Nacho's help. And then he'll get mad. And trust me, you DO NOT WANT Nacho mad at you. He won't go after you personally, but he will send his trusted catservant after you - and she is NOT to be messed with.

(Benoit, I could use a photoshop here).

Submit your nickname in the comments on the previous post. Just for shits'ngiggles, he's got a new post up today. There's even some good old fashioned thumping going on in there. I recommend a BEvERage of your choice.

Technically you have until midnight Pacific Time, but I'll accept late entries as I have a looser meeting tomorrow night and won't be able to look into it until then.

Oh and the reason Nacho's Catservant gets to help is because she coined the term "MomTard"

Speaking of MomTard (did you like that segue? I thought it was quite clever), she also has a new post up today! Which is great, because teh interweb knows that we just don't hear enough from her!

To put a long story short, she was going to put that nasty sanitizer on her child's ass but she forgot it at home. In the snarky wise words of Aestival:

Oh my God! No hand sanitizer! How could she have forgotten! (Seriously, this woman is psychotic about the sanitizer). Plus, someone ought to tell Momtard that sanitizer would probably hurt the delicate bum of a toddler, because I'd assume in that situation she'd douse not only her hands but the baby's rear end, too, just to be safe.

And then further snark wisdom from modestogirl and lawnmowerman:

MG: Who goes to visit their son at college and drags along their kid who has the hot squats? That's just cruel.

LMM: I suspect MomTard always takes the entire family with her wherever she goes. That way she can lavish care and affection and sanitizer on all of them all the time without anyone being left out. (I suspect also it burns her that son is away at college and no longer under the parental eyes. OMG he might be having SEX -- and imagine the GERMS! This is, I believe, the same son that is scheduled to move in back home, sharing a room with his brother, upon graduating...)

OMG. TEH SEX. And you thought the shortage of mindbleach was bad. What about the upcoming shortage of hand sanitizer?????

Contest Announcement!

Submitted by Sheila via email:

this guy is a hick with 6 kids who screws up his income taxes, illegally collects unemployment and wonders why he is broke, he not nuts but is a raging dumbass http://needtobedebtfree.blogspot.com/ you need to read a few pages back for some real gems

I figure, this guy needs a name. We have MomTard and PopTard has been given to her long-suffering loving husband. And what better way to get the juices flowing than a contest!

Ogg has already won the murst contest so you're out on that one. But you can win this one! And there might be prizes. Maybe. If you're good little haterz and snarkerz. And if anyone has any ideas for prizes.

How to participate:

One: go read the blog. I recommend some sort of BEvERage for when you do (unless you don't drink for whatever reason, then a nap might be in order afterwards)

Two: submit your suggested nickname and why it should be that in a comment. Deadline is one week today at midnight pacific time.

Yes, its that easy.

Submissions will be presented to a panel (me and Nacho the Cat - if he has time from his plans of world domination; if not, perhaps his catservant, T, can do it) for shortlisting. Following that, there will be a poll to vote on the name.

And if you don't want to submit a name and just want to snark, go ahead.

Ask MomTard

There are a goodly number of questions people want to ask MomTard. I, myself, posted one to her blog in the hopes that she would answer it. Sadly, it hasn't made its way through comment moderation onto her site.

On her Don't Leave Home Without It post, MomTard tells us about all the crap Useful Things she carries around in her purse, including superglue. At some point I either saw a movie or read somewhere that in Antartica, doctors use superglue to glue the edges of cuts together or they won't heal properly - something about the atmospheric pressure weirdness down there. So I asked her if she had ever used the superglue that she carries around in her craphole purse to glue the edges of a cut together.

Sadly, she has not answered. Or she will steal my idea. Or, because she is infatuated with germs, she will not answer my question because It Is Digusting To Put That Stuff On Your Hands Or Any Other Body Part.

In light of the fact that questions don't seem to be getting through, this post is for you to leave your questions for MomTard.

Let's start with this one, courtesy of The Dude:

Couple of questions I'd like to ask MomTard: About the germs and the kids:
With my first one I freaked every time he stuck something in his mouth....thinking he's going to get some rare jungle disease. HOWEVER, after a while I figured out they are tougher than they look. The second one chewed on keys and stuff like that and was just fine. After SEVEN, wouldn't you think she would have figured that out?

About other germs: How did she get pregnant SEVEN times if it meant getting pretty close to PopTard's one-eyed trouser snake? Did she sanitize it, or something? Wouldn't that be a pretty good spermicide.

Leave your questions for MomTard in the comments.

You know there had to be something about UFOs to make it on here

Props to Akubi for this one.

Snarkers and haterz, may I introduce you to the Prophet Yaweh? He'll teach you how to summon UFOs.

No really!

There are no videos to prove this, of course, since he just got his camcorder back from the pawn shop.

Things you wanted to know but were afraid to ask

Like: What is this place about?

Ever notice how many Stupid People™ create blogs and web sites and share their idiotic points of view? This blog will be dedicated to those bloggers who should just shut the hell up and get off the internet. The blogs spotlighted on Nutty Net Knowitalls serve as a kind of testament to humankind's eternal ego, stupidity, and folly. A kind of microcosm in themselves.

Today's winner is one we like to call MomTard because she qualifies for the Casey Serin Award for Stupidity™.

Comments and site links welcome